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filling the void

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

T3h grrlz

Can someone explain this phenomena that I've just observed to me?
It seems that whenever I find someone who I'm really attracted to, and not just on a physical level, they immediately go out and find ththe love of their life?
We usually know each other for something like 2-3 weeks before the girl in question suddenly finds a new boyfriend.
And I know what you're thinking, she just "developed" a boyfriend to get rid of me, but that's not the case, because we stay really good friends and I meet the boyfriend and everything, so it's not just some clever (oldest trick in the book?) ruse to get rid of me.

I can never catch a fucking break, never, not once...

In return, however, I have a great set of girl friends (not girl friends, girl friends, heavy on the "friend"), but no girl friend, if you know what I mean.
Granted, I value friendship more than a fleeting relationship, but I suppose that's because I have never actually been in love with any of my girl friends. I've had my fair share, but none of them have really done it for me, love-wise.
I'm sure I'd re-evaluate my views on friendship being more worth then a boy friend-girl friend kind of thing if I found someone that I actually fell in love with, but hey, until that happens, I'm standing firm.

This fucking winter ain't helping my mood either....

I just know murphy is out there somewhere, laughing his sick fucking ass off at my so-calls "missfortune", which is obviously all his doing.

I feel kind of like Salieri in the movie Amadeus. Except without someone to envy, and none of the religious crap. I just feel overlooked, and I feel that good things come to everybody else, just NOT me.

This is quickly turning into a tirade, so I'll stop now.

--Markus out.

P.S Bill Murray portrayed Hunter S. Thompson quite well in Where the Buffalo Roam. D.S


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